A job interview just wouldn’t be a job interview without at least one of those deep, probing questions designed to reveal the “real” you:
Where do you want to be in five years?
What about yourself would you most like to change?
If you were a tree, which kind would you be?
You know the questions. And you know how little they usually bear on the job at hand, let alone how ridiculous most of them are. But, like injections, these questions are painful annoyances that must be endured, so it’s best to be prepared.
Being prepared for questions that are off the wall means thinking broadly of answers that reflect positively on yourself:
Your biggest flaw? You try too hard.
What’s the worst thing your co-workers would say about you? You’re determined to get the job done, no matter what.
Where do you want to be? In a position where I can contribute and grow.
You get the idea – any answer that indicates you’ll be a brilliant, creative, hard-working, loyal, devoted and problem-free employee. In short, think Lassie.
A group of CEOs was asked by Inc. magazine some time ago what questions they posed in interviews. Some were basic, sensible questions like the one asked by the head of a special events marketer who has wasted time with non-serious candidates: “Who else are you interviewing with and how close are you to accepting an offer? “
Another, from the CEO of a recycling company that hires ex-convicts: “What were you in prison for?”
Then there were the more offbeat: “Why do they make manhole covers round?” That was from the head of a systems company who wants to see if interviewees can think on their feet (and determine quickly that any other shape would fall through the hole).
Another beaut, from the head of a software company: “If you were standing next to a skyscraper and I gave you a barometer, could you tell how tall the building was?” Answer: no. But the question is supposed to measure your creativity.
One of the best dumb interview questions was asked a retail furniture salesman. He was asked how he determined whether a shopper would buy before “wasting” time in the sales process. Of course, if that salesman (or any other one) could pinpoint a buyer with 100 percent accuracy before uttering a single word, he wouldn’t be sitting in a human resources manager’s office.
But the salesman gamely answered that, through experience, he had developed a good sense of which shoppers ultimately bought. That answer wasn’t good enough for the interviewer, who testily demanded: “Tell me precisely how you tell whether someone will buy before you start selling them.”
Realizing that the job he wanted was on the line and this ignorant HR person was asking an unanswerable question, the salesman came up with this one: “It’s a secret I learned after many years in the business,” he said. “It’s all in the eyes. If the person stops and looks at a sofa or bed and blinks four times, I know she’s going to buy it.”
Satisfied with the “scientific” response, the HR person hired the salesman.
(C) Copyright 2001 Evan Cooper. Syndicated by Paradigm News, Inc.
